Writer-host umaray sa nambabasag kay Jude Bacalso: How hurtful it feels
Jude Bacalso
PARAMI nang parami ang nagbibigay ng kanilang saloobin tungkol sa isyu ni Jude Bacalso matapos siyang tawaging “Sir” ng waiter sa isang restaurant sa Cebu.
Karamihan sa mga ito ay nabasa namin at lahat ay may kanya-kanyang punto mula sa mga kilalang social media influencers, showbiz personalities at netizens.
Habang nagba-browse kami kagabi ay dumaan sa feed namin ang mahabang post sa Facebook ng host, writer, journalist at member ng LGBTQIA+ community na si Gitri San Diego at ang ganda ng paliwanag niya tungkol sa isyu ni Jude at ng waiter.
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Simula ni Gitri, “I once ate at a 24-hour restaurant with a friend and another friend who’s a rather tall transwoman. The server took one look at her and called her ‘Sir’.
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“I saw that she was so visibly upset that she couldn’t even order. So as her friend, I stood up for her and told the server ‘Ang ganda-ganda ng bihis niya tapos tatawagin mo lang Sir?’ The waiter quickly apologized and my friend said ‘Thank you,'” pahayag niya.
Nakaranas na rin daw si Gitri ng ganitong trato at nasaktan siya kaya nakaka-relate siya sa naramdaman ni Jude ng mga sandalling iyon.
“Naranasan ko na rin ma-misgender and if I could only tell you how hurtful it feels, I would. Mararamdaman mo lang kung ikaw mismo ang nakaranas,” aniya.
Tama rin naman, pero base kasi sa mga nabasa naming komento mula sa ilang miyembro ng LGBTQIA+ community ay nagsabing OA ang reaksyon ni Jude, puwede naman daw palampasin lalo’t nag-sorry naman ang waiter at higit sa lahat kinondena ang dalawang oras na pagtayo ng waiter sa harapan niya.
Nagbigay ng dalawang ehemplo si Gitri kung paano ia-address ang isang LGBTQIA+ community member.
“Two things:
“1. Not everyone is informed about proper pronoun usage. But if you work in the service industry, this is something you must learn. You are there to cater to all kinds of customers.
“Here’s a tip: the way people present themselves is generally how they want to be addressed. So, if someone is presenting as a woman, call them ‘Maam’ or ‘Miss’. And if you’re not sure, you can always ask.
“We all now live in a time where pronouns matter. It equates to a person’s validity. So, if someone comes to your establishment, it’s just right that you value them. It’s politeness.
“The gas station I regularly go to employs two transmen and their faces literally light up when I call them ‘Sir’ or ‘Kuya’. Parte na ito ng buhay natin kaya sana, mas maging aware tayo sa pakikitungo sa iba’t ibang pagkatao.
“2. It’s very difficult to react with kindness when you’ve just felt insulted.
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“Siguro naman, lahat tayo nakaranas na mainsulto. Lahat naman nagkakamali. Having said that, feeling insulted doesn’t give you permission to be cruel. If you have been, then you must apologize for your mistake.
“These days, it’s so easy to be a target of people who don’t even know you, to be defined by a single viral moment, so, we must be more compassionate because like you, everyone is human.
“Hindi mo alam kung kailan ka susunod na magkakamali kaya iwasan ang maging mapanghusga. And it’s never okay to make fun of someone’s appearance lalo na kung panget ka rin naman,” pahayag pa ng kilalang journalist.
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