Maxene 5 years naglalasing, puma-party habang ipinagluluksa si Francis M
Maxene Magalona at Francis Magalona
LIMANG taon umiinom, naglalasing at puma-party-party si Maxene Magalona para makalimutan ang sakit na naramdaman nang mamatay ang amang si Francis Magalona.
Yan ang naging revelation ng Kapamilya actress nang mapag-usapan ang kanyang past partikular na noong naging magulo ang kanyang buhay habang nagluluksa sa pagpanaw ni Francis M.
Pag-amin ni Maxene totoong naging “kalat” siya noon at palaging nasa party para lumaklak ng alak dahil ang feeling niya ito lamang ang paraan para maibsan ang nararamdamang pagkawasak at pangungulila.
“Hindi rin ako ashamed to admit na kalat ako noon. And also it was because of my father’s death, because I didn’t know how to deal with it,” sabi ni Maxene sa nakaraang episode ng “Updated with Nelson Canlas” podcast.
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“So I turned to alcohol, I turned to partying so that I could numb the pain. And then everyone was parang, I guess pinagbibigyan ako kasi alam nilang may pinagdadaanan ako,” rebelasyon ng aktres.
Pagpapatuloy pa niya, “When I was going through that painful experience, hindi ko na-realize five years na pala akong tuloy-tuloy umiinom at puma-party.
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“‘Umiinom ako, naglalasing ako kasi nawala si papa eh.’ And then five years na pala, ganu’n pa rin ‘yung excuse ko. So you get caught in that cycle of distracting yourself, numbing the pain. And then when you wake up the next day, nandiyan pa rin naman,” pagbabahagi pa niya.
Pero dumating din daw yung araw na na-realize niya na kailangan na niyang tanggapin ang katotohanan na wala na ang kanyang ama na itinuturing din niyang best friend.
“So what I had to do was, I had to come to terms with it. I had to accept it. Kasi me drinking, partying, that was me resisting what was happening in the present moment.
“That was me denying my pain. And then when I started accepting, turning inward, feeling that pain, crying what I needed to cry, lahat ng emotions na hindi ko pinansin nu’ng limang taon na ‘yun, iniyak ko siya, hinarap ko siya, dinamdam ko siya, and finally tinanggap ko,” aniya.
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“Tinanggap ko that my dad’s death is a part of my human experience, and it is one of my unique assignments from God.
“Feeling ko kasi lahat ng mga pinagdadaanan nating challenges sa buhay natin, ‘yan ‘yung mga unique assignment na binibigay sa atin ni God, na alam niyang kaya nating daanan.
“Hindi niya tayo binibigyan ng pagsubok na hindi natin kaya. Akala lang natin hindi natin kaya,” saad pa niya.
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Sey pa ni Maxene, mas tumibay pa ang pananampalataya niya sa Diyos nang matanggap na niyang wala na talaga ang ama.
“And of course, being the person that I am now, hindi na umiinom, hindi na puma-party, this is what would make my dad proud, ‘di ba?
“Hindi ‘yung puma-party ako, hindi ‘yung nag-iinom ako at malungkot, I’m sure my dad would want to see me this way,” pahayag pa ng aktres.
Sumakabilang-buhay si Francis M noong March, 2009 sa edad na 44 dahil sa Acute Myelogenous Leukemia.
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