PHOTO: Instagram/@benedict_cua
KUNG sa harap ng camera ay madalas nating makita ang content creator na si Benedict Cua na masayahin, bibo at energetic.
Ngunit sa kanyang latest YouTube vlog, ibinunyag niya na nahaharap siya sa matinding mental health problem.
Siya ay na-diagnosed ng “major depression” na maaaring humantong sa tinatawag na “biopolar depression.”
Pagbubunyag niya, “I got diagnosed with major depression, which could lead to bipolar depression. We’re still observing until now kasi lahat extreme, extreme happiness, extreme sadness, extreme anger, up and down.”
“Hindi ko na maintindihan sarili ko but alam ko sobrang sad ako about everything. That there is no, kahit katiting, na light in this dark world. Ganun ‘yung feeling niya,” paliwang pa ng content creator.
Gayunpaman, sinabi ni Benedict na pursigido siyang labanan ang kanyang karamdaman upang tuluyan na siyang gumaling.
Saad niya, “Pero kahit gaano ako kalungkot that time, I still had the will to get better. Ang lakas ng power of will kasi doon ako nag-draw ng energy from my will to get better, to want to get better.”
Aniya, “Doon ako nagkaroon ng courage to seek ng help kasi kapag wala kang will, wala kang pag-asa kahit anong klaseng tulong ibigay sa’yo kasi ikaw mismo, wala kang desire to get better.”
Naikwento ni Benedict na dulot ng “burnout” at “pressure” sa pagiging content creator ang naging dahilan ng kanyang pinagdadaanan ngayon.
Sa labis na gusto niyang kumita ng malaki upang makatulong sa pamilya ay tila nawalan na siya ng oras para sa kanyang sarili.
“Entertainment industry is a roller coaster and you really don’t know where you would land in the next few years. So why not grab everything while it lasts, diba? And that was one of my first few mistakes,” paliwang ni Benedict.
Chika pa niya, “Hindi ko naman ito ginagawa solely para makapag pasaya ng tao. Kung ‘yun lang ang ginagawa ko on social media, then I wouldn’t be able to support myself or my family or all my loved one.”
“Ang nangyari, I wanted to reach my dreams faster. So I accepted all of it. I didn’t have time to create content that is purely for fun. Umabot nalang sa point na magva-vlog nalang ako kapag may sponsored post. Sobrang mali. Sobrang naging mali ‘yung mindset ko that time,” aniya.
Dagdag niya, “This went on 2 to 3 years and I remember before ako finally lumipad bg Hawaii, tumanggap ako ng sobrang daming projects.
“Imagine mo, naii-stress ako to produce one vlog a week at ang nangyari ‘nun, kailangan ko mag-produce ng apat na vlog for brands in one week. Naawa ako sa sarili ko. Sabi ko, ‘hala pinapatay ko sarili ko literally.’”
Ayon kay Benedict nais niyang ipaalala sa publiko na hindi biro ang magkaroon ng problema sa mental health.
“I’m doing this video so that everyone would take mental health seriously. So that we can all be kind and empathize when someone makes a mistake, let’s be kinder,” panawagan niya.
Related chika:
Benedict Cua inamin ang dahilan kung bakit hindi na active sa pagba-vlog