“WE know we are not perfect, but we know our love for each other is true and pure.”
Ito ang isang bahagi ng napakahabang mensahe ni Film Development Council of the Philippines Chairperson Liza Dino patungkol sa pinagdaraanan nila ngayon ni Ice Seguerra.
Buong-tapang na ibinandera ng dating beauty queen-actress ang struggle nila sa buhay bilang mag-asawa, lalo na ang tungkol sa pinaglalabanang depresyon ni Ice.
Sa kanyang Facebook account, ibinahagi ng FDCP chairwoman kung paano sila nagtutulungan ni Ice para mas maging matatag at masaya ang kanilang pagsasama. Nilagyan pa niya ito ng titulong “LOVING AND DEPRESSION.”
Narito ang kabuuan ng FB post ni Liza: “He’s out in the light again…for the third time this week.
“Iba ang saya ko pag nakikita kong lumalabas ang asawa ko that’s why lately, I’ve been posting pictures of us together, kasi I’m so happy na ok na sya ulit.
“The last few months have been rough for Ice and me. You see, Ice has depression, and the last three months mas naging intense yung manifestations nung depression nya.
“Lagi syang tulog. He doesn’t have the drive to do anything creative. Ayaw nya sa araw. Gusto nya lagi lang madilim ang paligid.
“Depression is something that he’s had for a long time, but through the years, we’ve been able to manage it.
“I used to be so bad at dealing with it. I actually sucked. I didn’t realize then that I was saying the wrong things you can say to a depressed person — words like ‘Tulungan mo kasi ang sarili mong maging masaya’ or ‘Ikaw lang ang nagpapalungkot sa sitwasyon mo’ or ‘It’s all in your mind.’
“Yup, that was me. I thought I was helping him by saying those things to “cheer him up” I didn’t realize na all the more siyang nadedepress kasi it sounded like hindi ko inaacknowledge yung pinagdadaanan nya at the moment,” lahad ni Liza.
Pagpapatuloy pa niya, “I didn’t know then that what he was expecting from me was to recognize that his feelings were valid, and the only way I can help was to genuinely ask him how he is feeling and for me to be there to listen to him.
“Do you want to talk about it? I’m just here when you’re ready to talk. What can I do to help today? How are you managing?
“These words help to make him feel at ease to open up because you’re not forcing it out from him. Hindi sya madali. Once he starts sharing his feelings, you can’t help but feel bad kasi sometimes yung utak mo iniisip ‘Bakit sya malungkot eh nandito naman ako?’, ‘Bakit, hindi ba ako enough?’ Pero what people have to realize is that, it’s not about you. It’s about them and what they feel, and it has nothing to do with you.
“At ito yung mas mahirap. Yung makarating dun sa feeling na di mo iisiping ikaw yung dahilan ng pagiging malungkot nila. Kasi ang tendency mo, isipin kung ano ang pagkukulang mo? Anong hindi mo nagagawa? Then the feeling of guilt will start to creep in.
“Baka I’m too busy for him. I’m prioritizing my work over him. Maybe I’m not giving him enough attention.
“This is the struggle. To find that balance. To not feel guilty, especially when you really are busy. That you’re really prioritizing work, and you think you’re not giving him enough attention.
“That’s where we’ve been these past three months. It was tough. There are good days and bad days. But we both confronted it head-on.
“When he’s weak, I am his strength. When I’m weak, he is my strength. Kapag kailangan kong iiyak, he is there to hug me as I cry on his shoulders, assuring me that I am not alone.
“When he feels anxious and agitated, I hold his hand tight and breathe with him. I don’t let go until he’s feeling better, and his hand starts warming up again.
“We recognize our faults, and we readily admit when one is falling short on being there for each other. Sa totoo lang, may ugali ako, I have a hard time saying sorry especially pag alam kong tama ako, but he’s made me realize that our goal as a couple is not about being right but being happy—na dapat walang pride.
“We know we are not perfect, but we know our love for each other is true and pure. I really didn’t plan to share this personal journey; I’m dealing with my own share of personal struggles right now.
“But today, just seeing him happy and seeing him smile again, that joy in his face because he feels he is back to his usual self is enough to wash away my own worries. We are ok. It’s going to be ok.
“Thank you love for encouraging me to write this. I love you so much. And always remember, in those times when can’t help but feel alone, I AM HERE FOR YOU. Katulad ng sinumpaan nating pangako noong ikinasal tayo….
“Simula ngayon, di ka na mag-iisa. Tayong dalawa na. Habambuhay.”